I am starting to develop a routine on the days that are relatively normal.
I wake at 9 am (which after going to bed at 10 pm is astounding.) I share breakfast with the dog in between throwing a ball. Then he stays outside while I go inside, put a bit of make up on and a pair of pants; then its back outside to take him for a walk.
We don't go anywhere special.
Sometimes its around the streets which is amusing. Every person I see either says hello, nods or comes in for a pat. I should have had a dog years ago! It would have kept the loneliness at bay! But I guess I wasn't ready for a dog then...
Sometimes around the cemetery. But I get lost in reading all the tombstones and wondering what they were doing when they died. Did they know. Expect it. I don't look at death the same as before.
Just one other thing that I have noticed different about me; my personality, since my operation.
Sometimes its in the car where we drive down to the beach. He runs and plays, avoiding the water, unless he sees a seagull and chases it...
then he stops ankle deep as if to say WTF??? How did I get here!???
I don't think I'm lonely. I would love to fall in love; have that wonderful relationship where I have to pinch myself just so I know its true - but then, I don't think I've ever had that. Only fleetingly if ever.
So its me and B Sharp; or Sharpie. He adores me lol, that will have to be enough.
I wake at 9 am (which after going to bed at 10 pm is astounding.) I share breakfast with the dog in between throwing a ball. Then he stays outside while I go inside, put a bit of make up on and a pair of pants; then its back outside to take him for a walk.
We don't go anywhere special.
Sometimes its around the streets which is amusing. Every person I see either says hello, nods or comes in for a pat. I should have had a dog years ago! It would have kept the loneliness at bay! But I guess I wasn't ready for a dog then...
Sometimes around the cemetery. But I get lost in reading all the tombstones and wondering what they were doing when they died. Did they know. Expect it. I don't look at death the same as before.
Just one other thing that I have noticed different about me; my personality, since my operation.
Sometimes its in the car where we drive down to the beach. He runs and plays, avoiding the water, unless he sees a seagull and chases it...
then he stops ankle deep as if to say WTF??? How did I get here!???
I don't think I'm lonely. I would love to fall in love; have that wonderful relationship where I have to pinch myself just so I know its true - but then, I don't think I've ever had that. Only fleetingly if ever.
So its me and B Sharp; or Sharpie. He adores me lol, that will have to be enough.
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